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Facts on Vin Diesel *part1

I was lurking around on the internet a couple of days ago when i found out that Chuck Norris is not the only one who has a bunch of facts written about him. There are a couple more people who have similar facts as Chuck, i thought facts about Vin Diesel would be an interesting read so here you go, have a nice evening folks.

1. Vin Diesel holds the rank of Major in the Confederated Space Armada.
2. Vin Diesel eats his weight in alfalfa every day.
3. Vin Diesel lives in a castle that he built by hand using bricks made of the compressed souls of the damned.
4. Vin Diesel’s real name is Mortimer Quincy Meriwether, Jr.
5. Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice announced that it would be possible to fight two wars at once. Incidentally, Vin Diesel announced that he could fight two whores at once.
6. Vin Diesel invented Dutch Process Cocoa.
7. Vin Diesel can communicate with dolphins.
8. Vin Diesel will kill you by the end of the week.
9. Vin Diesel wrote the guitar solo to Stairway to Heaven.
10. Vin Diesel tried to start a business where he would recharge batteries simply by gripping them in his hands.
11. If you pay close attention to the background of Zoolander, you can see Vin Diesel hog-tying a blue whale through an aquarium window.
12. Vin Diesel’s upper bicuspid is named Thailand and his pectorals are named East and West Berlin.
13. Vin Diesel planned out Michael Jordan’s entire basketball career on a used napkin from Arby’s back in 1989.
14. Vin Diesel once challenged James Polk to a race around the world.
15. Vin Diesel wrote all of Iggy Pop’s songs and gave him tips on stage presence.
16. Vin Diesel can solve a Rubik’s cube in 6.7 seconds.
17. Vin Diesel is responsible for single-handedly keeping Quebec part of Canada.
18. Vin Diesel came on Eileen.
19. Vin Diesel’s toast lands butter side up.
20. Vin Diesel made a sextape with Paris Hilton on her Sidekick. He later hacked into it, deleted the sextape, and distributed the rest of her information online.
21. Vin Diesel killed and devoured Mufasa from The Lion King, but let the hyenas live becasue they were quote “dirty creatures”.
22. Vin Diesel always forgets to put the new cover sheets on his TPS reports.
23. When The Transporter needs something transported, he calls Vin Diesel.
24. Vin Diesel already created a cure for AIDS; if only he could read and write.
25. Vin Diesel created the idea for the game of soccer when he would fly a 747 over Hawaii and punt giant bags of kittens out of the plane into Volcanoes below. It is believed that the Pompeii eruption was started this way.
26. Vin Diesel sheds his skin every 40 or so days as a defense mechanism.
27. Vin Diesel lives his life in “bullet-time”.
28. Vin Diesel owns a logging company. His only other employee being a blue ox.
29. Everytime Vin Diesel masturbates God kills a Siberian Tiger.
30. The greatest trick Vin Diesel ever pulled was making the world think he doesn’t exist.
31. Vin Diesel has the secret to Cold Fusion but refuses to share until Saved By The Bell is put back on television.
32. Vin Diesel can see why kids love Cinnamon Toast Crunch.
33. In Soviet Russia, Vin Diesel is you.
34. Every time Vin Diesel kills god, a kitten masturbates.
35. Gravity only affects Vin Diesel for six hours out of every day.
36. Vin Diesel hates manatees. He plans to finish them off, as he did with sabre-tooth tigers and wooly mammoths.
37. Vin Diesel was in fact responsible for the American public referring to Football as Soccer.
38. Vin Diesel once invented a plane with no wings. He put wheels underneath it and called it a train.
39. “Vin Diesel” is an anagram of “Devil Sin”. This is not a coincidence - Vin Diesel is in fact the fallen angel Lucifer.
40. Dan Brown was originally going to call his book “The Da Vin Diesel Code” but decided that would give the game away too much.
41. Vin Diesel is the son of Nostradamus and Jessica Simpson. It is unclear whether he inherited his good looks from his mother and his intelligence from of his father, or vice versa.
42. Once Vin Diesel had an epiphany and it resulted with the manifestation of all 57 varieties of Heinz (including the green and purple ketchup).
43. Vin Diesel is currently working an internship with the Frank Gehry architecture partnership, he intends to play a key role in the design of the new King Alfred Swimming Pool complex in Brighton, England. On the opening night of the project he will secret himself at the bottom of the pool and drink the entire contents, along with any unwitting swimmers enjoying the new facilities. He says novice swimmers taste the best.
44. Vin Diesel could never get the hang of Thursdays either.
45. Merely by flexing his left arm, Vin Diesel once caused an entire busload of nuns to spontaneously combust.
46. Vin Diesel is actually an incarnation of the Messiah, but he postponed the second coming to film ‘Fast & Furious 3′.
47. Vin Diesel likes to wear PVC because it wipes down easy.
48. Vin Diesel can tell how something tastes simply by touching it.
49. Vin Diesel was the culprit who ate Gilbert Grape. He would later describe the experience as “Similar in texture to panda meat , but not without its charms.”
50. Vin Diesel has a baseball cap made entirely out of ham.

And there are much more where these came from, huh.

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